Deep Connections with Bori Vigh [Nomad Summit 2020]
This past weekend in Chiang Mai, Thailand, was the 8th Nomad Summit.
I attended the full conference day on Saturday & then taught a writing workshop on Monday.
My notes from Bori’s *amazing* Deep Connections “workshop” are below.
For an overall review of the Nomad Summit event, venue, high-level takeaways, book recommendations, and links to all the other speaker notes I took, check out my main review:
This wasn’t really a normal workshop, and I loved it.
Bori got rid of all the chairs in the room and had us all sit in a circle on the floor to start, and then we did a series of interactive exercises as we worked through her list of steps to make a deep connection.
- Step 0 = Self-Connection, you must have a relationship with yourself and know what you want & need
- Exercise: stand with space around you, music on, eyes closed, move different parts of your body & dance → pay attention to yourself, we get distracted when we look at what everyone else is doing
- 1 = Fuck Yes, as in the “fuck yes or no” theory
- Exercise: stand in 2 concentric circles, make direct eye contact with the person across from you for 20 seconds without speaking, rotate partners every 20 seconds → pay attention to other people & when you feel that gut connection
- 2 = Slow Down
- Exercise: Get 1 partner and stand on opposite sides of the room, walk towards each other very slowly to meet halfway over the course of 7 minutes → even if it’s a “fuck yes” connection, we need to be patient & slow down & let it evolve without rushing into it
- 3 = Listening
- Exercise: Sit with a partner and put your hands together, close your eyes, and for 5 minutes, just feel each other’s hands & fingers → respect the boundaries of whoever is less comfortable & engage on their terms
- 4 = Trust
- Exercise: partner up, one partner will have eyes closed & the other will guide them, walk around the room & switch partners without letting them feel lost → trust that someone else is taking care of you & looking out for you
- 5 = Love
- Exercise: (Angel Whispers) half the group sits spread out with their eyes closed, the other half walks around and individually tells each person an affirmation (I love you, you are good enough, you are beautiful, the world needs you, I am glad you’re here, etc) → not personal based on who anyone is but because they’re what we all need to hear
It was all so powerful that I (a) messaged my therapist afterwards and (b) ended up crying later that night when the emotions released.
One of the biggest moments for me personally was the “slow down” exercise and feeling like it would be such a gift to get to slowly develop a relationship with someone & be met halfway.
With this lifestyle, my connections are quick, even if they feel deep & impactful. And I really hope to have more relationships (romantic, friendships, and professional) that have both parties patiently focusing on developing something meaningful together.
So, although this wasn’t the standard professional development workshop, I thought it was absolutely wonderful & such a highlight of my weekend. And even though it felt very personal & intimate, I can definitely see how it can be applicable across any type of relationship — including professional ones.
Katherine Conaway is a digital nomad, working remotely while she travels the world — on the road since June 2014.
